Sometimes during the tantrums, the sibling fights over toys, and during the crazy schedule I try to run, I can forget the joy of what I have in front of me. This weekend when we were out to brunch with Matthew, I captured Matthew at his finest. He is kind, energetic, inquisitive (what’s that mom?), and loving. His eyes tell stories and he makes me smile.
This last week at work I had the opportunity to hear Chris Williams speak of his personal story of letting go. He lost his wife and two children to a drunk driving accident almost ten years ago. He spoke of forgiveness and moving forward with his life. It was an unforgettable moment for me to listen to his story. His humbleness, quiet power and gratefulness for the life he has lived helped me to take a deep breath. How many times do I harbor anger for something that has happened to me? How many times have I carried this frustration throughout my days, letting it inadvertently control me? Chris framed forgiveness as a selfish act, saying that the act of letting go helped him to move forward. Wow. What a powerful thing to remember when things don’t go as I want them to go. Here is to hoping that I never have to face something as tragic as Chris to learn this.
For now, I am grateful for the moments. This weekend we enjoyed so much fun together…skiing together, playing pretend together, building castles and jails for Matthew’s infamous “mean guy” together, and snuggling as a family of four squeezed into our queen-sized bed. Sometimes life seems hard, sometimes I have no energy, but always I feel lucky. Lucky to have this little Matthew in my life, lucky that Katharine is his big sister, and incredibly blessed to have Jon to share it with me.